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Mon 26th Jan 2009

I often get irritated by abbreviations in text messages. This morning my Mom sent me a text which read “Sorry 4 yesterday. Ok 2 cum 4 dinner next Sunday? Luv Mom.”

On the one hand, maybe she should be applauded in her efforts to embrace this youth-speak. But on the other hand, I can't help feeling she really should know better at that age. I fear that the regularity in which these spelling short-cuts are used by people has the potential start eroding language. There'll come a time when our written word will resemble the tracklisting of a Prince LP. And for what benefit? To be saved from the effort of typing just 6 measly extra letters? I mean, those seven extra letters cost nothing do they? (Well to be fair, I suppose there are a limit to the number of characters you can send in a single message and if you exceed this limit, there'd be the additional charge incurred in sending 2 messages. I accept economics are involved in certain circumstances and I’m not going to insist that someone should pay double where it can be avoided; that would be pointless. I’m not that much of a pedant for heaven's sake). Irritatingly, when I re-typed this particular message into my own phone, I was appalled to find that she would still have had 75 characters to use. If anything, I think she should have typed the full words out just to get more of her money’s-worth.

And what's even worse is that as I’m typing all this, I’ve also just noticed her use of the word ‘cum’, which seems to be the spelling more commonly used in making reference to a sexual climax. Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t really want to think about ejaculatory fluids in the same context as my own mother. Such imagery is most unsettling. I just hope she’s not sending this spelling of the word to all her colleagues and friends. She’ll be a considered a laughing stock, or even worse, mistakenly assumed as a kind of text message based pornographer. It might sound like a big laugh to you now, but this is something that I’m going to have to broach with her the next time I see her. Damn, what a troublesome blog I have spawned today. I’m not looking forward to addressing this matter in the slightest.

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